4.05.2016

Define "Dating"...

Ok, what counts and doesn't count as a boyfriend?

Because in my head, and what I say when people ask how long I've been single for, is 4 years. Which, I'm starting to realize sounds... awful. And is always, shortly followed by the inevitable "...well, whats wrong with you then" look. (Nothing, duh, I'm perfect.)

But really, technically speaking, that's just how long its been since my last serious, healthy, happy relationship.

I haven't been counting the people I've "seen" in since then - and I certainly don't count the toxic infection of the brain that was my 11 month affair with him. (And I don't think I should have to count that, I mean he had a girl for fucks sake. Surely if I couldn't lay claim to him then I don't have to now, right? Please say right.) Also... the Brit? Because that was like 6 weeks of heavy petting at most, and then he got weird.

Does that count? Does it all count? Where does one draw the line?

It's a double edged sword; something's wrong with me if I say I haven't been in a relationship in four years, but something's clearly way worse if I have to own up to what and who the last few were...

Except for the Californian, he's a goodie. But I don't mention him because I get this goofy smile on my face as soon as I start going there which is more or less a stop sign for guys and the beginning of a much larger conversation with girls.

So, just the crazies. Great.

...

I think, as it stands, and as far as I'm comfortable owning up to at this point anyway, to date I've had: two serious relationships (read: boyfriends), one really fucked up lesson, one storybook romance (less fairytale more steamy adult novel), and a few frogs. But like, those really cute little tiny frogs that hop around super fast and you try to catch but when you do realize all the fun was actually just in catching them and so you let them go again.

Yeah, that sounds about right.

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