Being that this is the year I'm going to change my life – it is, in case you didn’t know – I’ve been doing a lot of thinking. About love, about life, & everything else in between.
More specifically about vulnerability, and the idea that if you don’t put yourself out there, you won't get what you want.
"Let people know exactly what you're going for, and watch things fall together" I like to say, "Life starts at the end of your comfort zone!" (ok that one isn't mine, I stole it - but still, it's true.)
Yes you'll be opening yourself up to getting hurt/embarrassed/disappointed but, you might also get everything you ever dreamed of. (sounds like a fair trade)
People are drawn to positivity. They're attracted to drive.
Think about it, for a lot of us, one of the top things on our list of qualities to find in a partner, before lots of money & sometimes even a job, is drive & determination. As long as he has a plan – a good one, winning the lottery doesn't count, ever, Sam* – they usually still get to be on the short list. (if you're not a selfish, gold-digging bitch of course)
And that's because the sense of purpose is contagious. And knowing we're taking hold of our destiny & are headed somewhere great even though we might have to struggle a bit to get there, is not only acceptable, but exciting. And inspiring.
Too many people, including myself, are settling for what comes to them rather than go after what they want. Well guess what? It's not gonna get better if that's your continued approach. Usually, if something is coming at you, it's driven by something else, someone else, meaning their wants & their needs & their purpose being fulfilled, by you. Sure the attention is nice, but happiness is when YOU feel fulfilled.
Now, I'm not saying that because I made a promise to put myself out there more I'm going to start saying "yes" to every Joe that walks by me just because he's "got a plan" (Sam*).
What I'm saying is that if I don't at least try to go after what I want, then I can't expect to just "find" it.
Make sense? Good.
So, do yourself a favour this year and, like me, make a vow to put yourself out there, in at least 1 major way. Put it out there into the universe, so to speak.
… And I don't mean "The Secret" way of wishing it true until you can't wish any harder.
Please, let's be forreal here people.
*Sam is a friend who tried to set me up with a rather questionable suitor recently. It is not her real name - but she knows who she is.
So, are you with me? How are you going to put yourself out there this year?!